I get the urge to leave a lot. To just get in my car and go. Sometimes I drive for hours, just so that I can leave my troubles behind. I love the way it feels; the air blowing on my face, the cruising, the time to clear my head, the ability… to see more. (exhale)
Something in me is changing or maybe I’m just finding a piece of me that I buried away many years ago when I couldn’t afford to slow down. I haven’t been working. It’s still calling my name, but I needed a break. I was extremely serious about the previous post. Last weekend I started to see the bigger picture. I started to see what my hard work and determination would create. And though I have my ups and downs; I know and firmly believe that I can be successful. It took a great second to even come to this part of my revelation but I’m seriously spring cleaning my soul and my apartment. I’ve been walking around blindly since I graduated. It will be a damn year this May. Crazy. (and I got up to check just to make sure I wasn’t losing my mind). But I mention all this because my heart is vying for my attention. My need for order and peace is busting through the hinges.
I’ve been enjoying the weather, sitting on my balcaony with tea and a good book. Just relaxing. And today I realized I really need to organize my art stuff. It’s everywhere. I have a small place but I have stuff in my kitchen cabinets, under my futon in the living room and my dining area is where my computer is. I have photo stuff tucked away in the hallway closet, in another one I have books, paints and more, then I have a desk in my bedroom that contains more stuff like rulers and etc. But it’s ridiculous. I cannot afford a second bedroom right now so after a week in here its all mayhem and fullishness. But in the midst of it all I realized that I need a clean, organized work space. I will just have to pick up whatever I do the night before and put it away. I can’t let it get ridiculous in here.
But besides all that my spirit is just regrouping. I’m refilling my brain and heart with positivity. Working and reading books like, “Think and Grow Rich”, by Napoleon Hill. Amongst the photography books, inspirational success stories, and educational info, I’m just preparing myself. It’s bout to initially start; I think after my bday… MAY 27 🙂 It seems far but time goes fast… like I said, a year! It has been successful. A lot has happened. But I’m content, grateful, and just ready to proceed. So… I’ll do some updates in between… I’ll probably post notes… just info I come across that I think is important.