BAG 1 – So… as usual I am always jumping into the deep end. Why do I do that. To be honest, the problems I ran into were for the most part, minor. Granted, the first pattern I used didn’t make that much since but I still thought it was doable. I ended up wasting a lot of space in my seam allowance which resulted in a puckered vinyl mess. I think the choice of pattern was my first mistake, the lack of directions left me questioning a few things and it seemed over complicated.
BAG 2 – So I went back to an even simpler design in which I did everything for the most part right besides over heating the vinyl. But then… OMG… As I was trying to sew with both sides of the vinyl facing out, the feed dog pretty much ate it up. And mind you I’m trying to sew through 8 layers of thick fabric. So that is when I realized I needed a special presser foot. Exhale. My second bag was supposed to be my redemption and boy it was lookin fab, minus the overheated spots on the vinyl where I over ironed, lol. But when I started sewing it with the vinyl sides facing out, the feed dog basically destroyed it and my determination left it with rips and snags. AND O… Don’t put a pin through vinyl unless it’s in the seam allowance; use clips. Long story short. Another one bit the dust. Lol. Exhale.
BAG 3 – I loved the pattern of bag 2 and how it was looking but I can’t restart it until I get the presser foot that will feed the fabric. And after feeling defeated, not once but twice, I said let’s take this back to elementary school and use basic canvas fabric. And finally it came out. My only issue is that I should have added the plastic canvas in the lining in order to stiffen its structure but other than that it came out quite perfect. It’s a basic canvas clutch. It would be cute if I added a silver chain to it but for now I love it for what it is. It was and idea fully realized. I love the tucked edge around the opening, and that I got the metal snap on correctly, how I lined up the pattern, how my tag looks with it, that pointed tip, and that it’s a representation of what’s to come.
I am so excited that I was able to create this hobo bag as my first piece! I took an old wrap skirt that I purchased up in Fort Brag, that never really fit right, and decided to make it into a bag. The fabric is so pretty and I saved it just so i could do something like this. For my first piece on a sewing machine I am so very proud of myself. I was able to put on a zipper and even added a medium-sized pocket on the inside.
Though I made a few mistakes, which I expected, I am so happy that it came out as well as it did, considering I haven’t made anything before with a sewing machine. And I must add, I didn’t use a patten…I kind of found the fabric speaking to me. I am just so excited that I was able to make something pretty awesome.
I went out yesterday to Joanns and found some beautiful pieces of fabric. I can’t wait to get started on them and see where this leads.
I am so excited to announce that I have finally purchased my first sewing machine. Though I am not new to sewing, I have very limited experience with using a machine. Four years ago I signed up for a beginner sewing class but had to drop it as I found a new job and the hours conflicted. But in that class, I barely learned how to thread a machine or wind a bobbin. I only got as far as sewing a few basic stitches, so trust me when I say, I am definitely out of my depth.
So why did I buy a sewing machine? And not just a simple $100 machine. First off I wanted to make sure that when the time comes the body can handle sewing upholstery fabrics and leather. If I just wanted to sew clothes and quilts I wouldn’t have minded a basic machine but most of them can’t handle sewing through many thick layers of fabric. So I thought that it would be worth the investment to get the Janome HD1000.
But back to why… Believe it or not it was actually my dad that showed me how to hand sew and before i knew it I was sewing clothes for my barbies and dolls. One christmas my parents got me one of those kid sewing machines and I was so happy. I remember it was white with a red carry case. I loved that thing. But for some reason it jammed or broke like my damn microscope my mom got me one year. And there we were returning it but they had run out of replacements and that was it.
I mention all this as it was my grandmother who encouraged my creative interest. She saw it in me before anyone else did. I didn’t just buy it because of her. I didn’t just buy it so I can sew a few pajama pants, or skirts and perhaps a quilt… I didn’t even just buy it to make grocery bags or to design leather hand bags or to use the scraps of fabric I’ve been saving for years. I bought it because it was the first thing in a long time to truly excite me. Because I’m tired of putting it on the back burner. Worst case scenario is I get to make some botched pajama pants and can re-sell the machine for a pretty penny. The best case scenario, i learn how to wind the bobbin and thread it and actually make something.
I have so much to learn and am so excited, it has been a long time coming.
I was taking a look back at one of my first sketchbooks when I decided I would throw all inhibitions aside and commit to completing it. My most recent just has scribbles of love affairs and hopes and dreams, more of a journal than an actual art book. I have accepted that that’s what it wants to be. An inner perspective of all things real and yet want to run a way from. I say all this as I want to start a new one… It may not seem like a big deal but it kinda is to me. They each represent a transformation, a beginning and an end. But looking back has given me hope. Much needed hope as I want to turn my scribbles and pain into my best work. I dug the already reserved book out of storage and dusted it off. It still smells fresh, untouched and still in perfect condition. I hope this time not only my heart pours out onto it; But my soul.
My power feels leached and drained. I have been giving it away to irrelevant love affairs, my fears and doubts. It’s not that I haven’t accomplished a few things here and there but as usual I don’t give my self credit most of the time and I am not satisfied with where I am artistically. I want more.
I desperately need to reconnect to my inner power. And not just connect with it but nourish it daily. It’s not that I don’t know what to do. Yoga, wake up and “get up” instead of lounging around all day until it’s time for me to go to work, and organizing my life so that I’m not stressing my self out because I’m continuously procrastinating.
I know I have power. Trust me, I have an irrevocable force of it, and so do you. I’m just feeling a bit guilty as I haven’t been putting it to use. I’ve been out of school for two years and though I relaunched the blog it pales in comparison in what I want to actually do with it and with my art. There are no more excuses, no more fears even, that can stop me from admitting that I have been giving it all away to the wrong things.
If you don’t know you have power I encourage you to look deep within and tap into it. And if your like me and you know you have it… I encourage you to find some perspective, actually ask yourself what your power has been feeding. It’s time to harness the power within, to nourish it and put it to use.
People are hurting. I feel so much empathy for those experiencing such rude and awful discrimination. My heart breaks. The only hope I can give is to remind all of you that we have a right to achieve our “American” Dream. Do not waste it. Embrace it and be proud of your efforts. Do not run ashamed. Do not fear. You do not stand alone. And I will not stand idly by as bystander. And regardless of your country, continue to fight for your right to dream. I can’t imagine the hate people are experiencing but let that shit be your motivation to rise higher. I can’t let my anger and sadness get the best of me. So today as I was leaving the pharmacy at Kaiser I decided to purchase a bouquet of silver dollar eucalyptus. I say this to suggest a trip to the local park, some time away from the news is what we need. We need to reconnect to hope, to nature. Tap into it.
To all races, men and woman, LGBT, and religions I stand by you.
Most of us run from the idea that you should feel your pain but in order to grow its one of the first things you have to do. Whether it’s a loss of a love one, an ending of a relationship, or facing a set back; Embracing your pain is about transforming it into strength. Think of it this way, to deny it and put it off will slowly eat away at you. But to face it and sit with it, to nurture it, to let it overcome you is to release it so that it may become the strength to keep pushing forward. So don’t be afraid to feel your pain.
Isn’t it frustrating when something doesn’t work out. It seems like the very fact that “it” didn’t, is proof that you shouldn’t be doing it. In an instant doubt comes rushing in and you instantly become paralyzed, questioning your very existence, purpose and whether “it’s” all worth it.
I had to be honest as to why “it” may not have worked out. Have I been giving my 100%? No. I have my list of excuses but I can admit they aren’t valid. I’ve felt like I’ve been stuck in limbo but “It” not working out is the kick in the ass I needed.
There is this quote by Joel Osteen that says, “God isn’t moved by our cries, he’s moved by our actions.” I don’t know about you but I know I have been laid up crying about everything rather than taking action and making the necessary improvements in my life.
When “it” doesn’t work out, it’s important to take time to reflect, adjust and most importantly, do. No matter what though, you can’t let it discourage you. Maybe reading a book will help guide you on your emotional journey or pursuing a hobby or starting something… but just do it. No more complainng. Take baby steps to pursue your dreams; Because it is undeniably worth it.